Monday, January 23, 2012
The Garage and the Limousine
Airborne, who is only nine, asked "Whats a Whoo Ha and a Cha Cha?"
"Its a girls private parts" I explained.
" We call it the garage an the limo" Tech Monkey corrects me.
Before I had children, I assumed that all of these crazy guy behaviors were nurture not nature. When I had little baby boys I was convinced that I would raise superior male beings that would not find farting and belching to be Olympic caliber sports. MY boys would not think that hitting each other in the gonads was the funniest thing on earth. They would not laugh hysterically when the word wiener was said in polite company. In fact they would not say wiener at all.
I could not have been more WRONG about the nurture/ nature thing. Boys are simply wired differently than girls. Their wants, desires and humor are mostly incomprehensible . But one thing is true, no matter how old the boys, if left with out female influence, wherever they live will become a frat house. Given enough time they will be running around half naked in their underwear flicking towels at each other and making each other smell their farts. It is inescapable. It is only though puberty that we women can gain control and tame the wild beasts. The only way to hold back the barbarian tenancies is for them to believe that they will never get a girl if they continue on this path. And, for that to be important, they must go through puberty. Puberty makes men mailable. Or at least more predictable in their motivations. So ladies, cover up the Whoo Ha's and the Ta Ta's. If you control the Who Ha you control the WORLD!